Twenty-five
is super young. So it makes me feel really secure that in eight years, I will
still be super young. In fact, it feels empowering to have that much time to
(basically) just fuck around and figure it all out. It leaves lots of room for
mistakes and mind changing, which is brilliant, because I kind of enjoy both of
those. Something I do kind of have a set goal for myself is to publish some real
writing. SOMETHING, ANYTHING. Probably poetry. I have learnt in my eighteen
years so far that I love creating, and have been able to narrow it down. And
the root of my hearts expression seems to be… writing. Even right now as I type
this out, I’m getting a weird joy from seemingly nowhere. WHERE IS IT COMING
FROM? IDK, FREAKY STUFF. But anyways, writing holds a particular love tug on my
soul, and therefore I feel that it is extremely important to pursue it.
So I guess
that is a future goal that is shaping my present. As of right now, (December 24th,
2015) I have applied to 5 universities. Each application had respective aims at
English and Creative Writing. I will probably make another blog post somewhere
down the line about pros and cons, and deciding which one would be best for me
to go to. (I`ve been conditionally accepted to TRU, which is nice and nature-full
and a bit secluded so WHOOP. That`s a definite option.) But as for what I would
like to accomplish in the next eight years, regarding schooling, I am very
unsure. I mean, I`m sure I`ll end up with a bachelor’s degree of some sort,
pursuing something writing inspired. I`ve thought about teaching high school
English, but it feels really back-up plan for myself, personaly. So I am keeping an open mind to what might be better for
me. I`ve also thought travel writing might be really neat recently. Even
professional blogging, because that is real. That would be cool as heck. Who
knows. So here we are, at the start of my professional blogging career, lol.
Mainly, I just feel like I need to push myself to be thinking about more as
well, reflecting and such and even if no one ever reads these posts, they
already feel helpful to me.
So anything
else down the road, eight whole years from now, is really, uncontrollably
unknown. Which is bittersweet. I sure as hell didn`t know where I would be now
when I was ten years old, so I`m going to try my best to rule out thinking I
know where I`ll be in eight more years. After all it`s silly, really, I guess
(and as I am writing I am actually just telling myself this for the first time)
to consider that just because I’m almost an adult (eh) and yadayada that I have
any more of a clue of what the future holds. If I let myself imagine, I mean,
that could lead to disappointment right ? ?!!! ?
Aren`t we told not to get our hopes up? Ah, who knows. Because aaaaaaahhhhh shiet
yes, as much as we may be in love with somethings about our life now, they are
subject to change. And we must accept that sort of thing to realize that
change, isn`t always bad. Though it may be hecka unpleasant. (A future post coming
on this as well.)
Other than
that, travelling is a big thing that I wanna do while I`m young. And I actually
don`t even know if I like it yet. I tend to miss people and pine for B.C. BUT,
I feel like even if the experience is frackin` torturous at times, it`s very,
very necessary. I want nothing left doubted, yuh know, isn`t that what our
early twenties (and heck, maybe your whole
life) is about? Playing everything out as far as you feel it, and leaving everything
that you`ve ever considered completely explored? And heck, maybe that`s what
this blog will be about. Mapping the uncharted.
Merry
Christmas Eve/actually Christmas morning. Love BC`s
lil` Rainstorm Canvas. (me.)
